Hi, my name is Hana, Attack on Titan (Shingeki no Kyojin) manga reader and anime
whinger watcher. I used to publish AoT meta on tumblr but one day, in a fit of anger over their new censorship policies, I permanently deleted my entire blog. Days later I felt remorse over that impulsive act: losing years of content—no matter how mediocre—made me feel like a certified idiot.
I wish Levi Ackermann would’ve been there to tell me to make the choice I’d least regret.
Since then I’ve been looking for a place to park my stuff, and it hasn’t been easy because I write mostly smut. There are places like Literotica and Archive of Our Own that lets writers like me publish without fear of censorship, but I wanted a place I could put ALL my stuff in and not just the fanfic.
After months of being lost, my friend Claire offered a digital space for me to stay in for as long as I needed. Honestly, I was unwilling to accept at first because her beverlyclaire.com domain is about pretty designs and such. Won’t my ramblings about Isayama making me suffer psychologically or AUs of Jean pounding his rock hard cock inside Eren’s tight asshole going to tarnish her brand or something? Well, she’s assured me it won’t, because I get my own subdomain: hanasblog. As long as I make it clear it’s me writing the dirty stuff and not her then things should be fine.
So listen up everyone, it’s me, Hana, writing all this nasty hogwash, and not Claire, the owner of this domain. Okay?
Claire’s been such an angel friend, the big sis I’ve always wanted, especially when I was going through a horrible breakup. Now she’s given me a virtual space I feel safe in. She jokes it’s part of her volunteer work, ahaha! Perhaps one of these days I’ll have the dough to buy my own hosting. But in the meantime I’ll squat here. Love you to bits, Claire-senpai, big mwah!
Bit by bit I hope to find shreds of the old tumblr stuff I’ve written and publish them here. It’s going to take a while, but then writing smut is my hobby so it shouldn’t be that hard (insert “That’s what she said!” winking smiley face here, followed by the eyerolling emoji).
Some people are really curious about others, as in: Where do you live? How old are you? What do you look like? As if it matters! I don’t understand this obsession, this I-demand-to-know-everything-about-you nosiness that seems to be the norm these days. I winced upon hearing of deranged fans rooting out the real identity of the Italian novelist Elena Ferrante. She wants to be anonymous, why for heaven’s sake are readers demanding she be exposed? I’ve read her sensationalized, jaw-dropping, cringe-inducing, magnificent Neapolitan quartet and my god, they’re soooo obviously autobiographical. The heroine in the books (if not every single character in them) has more giant warts than shining virtues. I totally understand why she wants to hide her face and write under a pseudonym. Why can’t people just leave her alone?
So running along that vein… what I’m trying to say is that I won’t be putting up my IRL mugshot in this About page. Obviously I’m old enough to write R-18 stuff, and really, that’s all anyone needs to know. Besides, I’m no longer a student. I work full time now, and if my boss finds out about my guilty pleasure (i.e., writing and publishing smut) I’ll have my ass kicked out the door in no time. Not gonna happen!
I’m located in Tokyo, Japan, but I won’t tell you exactly where, because I don’t want to be stalked nor taken advantage of. I’m not simply being paranoid, mind you.
Once upon a time there was a gullible young girl who met some friendly people on the internet. Let us visit you, they said, it’ll be fun! The girl, being stupid, readily agreed. Turns out these internet people only saved enough for a plane ticket, and expected the girl to not just house and feed them for a fortnight, but also to drop everything and play unpaid travel agent/tour guide/interpreter/porter/chauffeur. All on her meager student budget. The girl, being really really stupid, fell for this ploy a few more times. Now she’s saying, “Never again.”
I feel that some internet people become extra friendly once they find out where I live. No longer falling for that, nuh-uh. Am saddled with student loans, not star enough to afford hanger-ons, so cool it, okay?
Wanna know what I look like? Here, let me throw you a bone to gnaw on.
My ancestor on one side would look like this if she were a character in a Hunger Games setting:
My ancestor on the other side appears to have looked like this 300 years ago:
You’d think I’d be this mixed-race, fit-for-the-big-screen type of exotic beauty but alas! I’ve searched and searched for the animal that resembles me the most and this is the closest thing I could find:
If you see me walking down the street, or driving a car, or ordering from a food truck, please don’t stare at me. I know I look adorable, but still…
Hope you enjoy this blog and happy reading! Please make sure to comment on a story of mine you’ve read and found to be palatable. You’ll have my undying gratitude, because the truth is that writing is a horribly lonely endeavor. It’s precious comments from readers like you that keep me from going totally batshit crazy with all the screaming into the void that I do.
xoxo – hana